Backbiting (ghibah) is speaking about someone in a way they would dislike if they heard it—even if what is said is true. The Prophet ﷺ defined it clearly:
ذِكْرُكَ أَخَاكَ بِمَا يَكْرَهُ
“Mentioning your brother in a way he dislikes.”
[Sahih Muslim, 2589]
It is one of the major sins, likened in the Qur’an to eating the flesh of one’s dead brother:
وَلَا يَغْتَب بَّعْضُكُم بَعْضًا أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًا فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ
“And do not backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his brother when dead? You would detest it.” [Qur’an 49:12]
How to Avoid Backbiting (Ghibah)?
1. Remember Allah Before Speaking
Pause and ask: “Would I say this if they were here?” This mindfulness is a shield against careless words.
The Prophet ﷺ taught: “Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day should speak good or remain silent.” [Sahih al-Bukhari, 6018]
2. Guard Gatherings From Gossip
If talk turns to backbiting, change the subject, defend the absent person, or walk away.
Allah ﷻ says in the Qur’an:
“And He has already revealed to you in the Book that when you hear the verses of Allah denied and ridiculed, do not sit with them until they engage in another conversation. Otherwise, you would surely be like them.”
This verse shows that if a believer stays in a gathering of falsehood, mockery, or sinful talk without rejecting it, they are counted among those people.
3. Focus on Your Own Faults
Ibn al-Qayyim said: “Whoever preoccupies himself with his own faults will not find time for the faults of others.” Self-reflection leaves no space for ghibah.
4. Make Du‘ā’ for the Person Instead
If you feel the urge to talk about someone’s shortcomings, replace it with a silent du‘ā’ asking Allah to forgive them and guide them.
5. Keep Good Company
Surround yourself with people who fear Allah and avoid idle speech. Being with mindful companions makes backbiting less likely.
The Prophet ﷺ said:
مَثَلُ الجَلِيسِ الصَّالِحِ وَالجَلِيسِ السَّوْءِ كَحَامِلِ المِسْكِ وَنَافِخِ الكِيرِ، فَحَامِلُ المِسْكِ إمَّا أنْ يُحْذِيَكَ، وإِمَّا أنْ تَبْتَاعَ مِنْهُ، وإِمَّا أنْ تَجِدَ مِنْهُ رِيحًا طَيِّبَةً، وَنَافِخُ الكِيرِ إمَّا أنْ يُحْرِقَ ثِيَابَكَ، وَإِمَّا أنْ تَجِدَ رِيحًا خَبِيثَةً
“The example of a good companion and a bad one is like that of a perfume seller and a blacksmith. The perfume seller may present you with perfume, or you may buy some, or you may just enjoy a pleasant smell from him. As for the blacksmith, he may burn your clothes, or you may be affected by his foul smell.”
[Sahih al-Bukhari, 2101 | Sahih Muslim, 2628]
6. Repent Quickly if You Fall Into It
The scholars advise making istighfār and du‘ā’ for the person you backbit. Some also encourage mentioning them with good in gatherings where you once spoke ill.
7. Speak Words of Benefit
Engage in dhikr, Qur’an recitation, or beneficial knowledge instead of idle talk. Filling the tongue with goodness leaves no room for ghibah.
8. Remember Its Weight on the Day of Judgment
The Prophet ﷺ warned that backbiting eats away good deeds like fire consumes wood. On the Day of Judgment, those you spoke against will take from your hasanāt.
9. Replace Criticism With Advice
If someone’s fault concerns you, speak to them privately with love, not behind their back. The Prophet ﷺ said: “The believer is the mirror of his brother.” [Sunan Abī Dāwūd, 4918]
10. Practice Silence as Worship
Staying silent with the intention of avoiding sin becomes an act of ‘ibādah. Even if others gossip, you protect your scale of deeds by guarding your tongue.
11. Think of the Honor of a Muslim
The Prophet ﷺ said: “The blood, property, and honor of a Muslim are sacred.” [Sahih Muslim, 2564]
To speak ill of someone is to violate that sacred honor.
12. Understand the Exceptions Carefully
Backbiting is only permitted in limited cases—such as warning against harm, seeking justice, or asking for help in correcting someone. Even then, it must be truthful and necessary.
